Silly Sex Stories

Your place for all the awkward and funny sexcapades you can imagine.

so guys, 

submissions would make us happy :3

Alright, so in my drawing class, we’ve just started drawing from nude models.  Today was our first time with a cis male model.  He was this ginger guy, and when we were ready he got up in front of the class and took off his robe.

And there was almost nothing there.

I’m dead serious it was the smallest penis I’ve ever seen.  Like in my rough drawings it is a literal circle.  And I kinda realized that that was probably some of the girls’ first time seeing a penis in real life and I kinda.  Died.  Laughing.

Anonymous asked: New Years I had to sneak my drunk boyfriend downstairs since his friends dropped him off at my house. He was really really really drunk. My dog had puppies and we keep the puppies downstairs. Well after he slept some of it off we started having sex. I started to orgasm and since my parents were upstairs sleeping I had to be quiet. To stay quiet he put his hand over my mouth, well I accidentally bit him and he said ouch loudly. My dog didn't like that and jumped up and bit him in his ass.


Answer:

oh my gosh poor guy!!!

come on guys, you have to have gotten silly sexy over winter break!!

tell us your stories!

-caz

Anonymous asked: So I was hooking up with this guy a couple of nights ago. We wanted to be daring and his parents were asleep so we were going at it in the living room and had to be dead silent. Half an hour goes by and right in the middle of us having sex I hear from the TV "My dick cost a late night fee Your dick got the HIV My dick plays on the double feature screen Your dick went straight to DVD." It took all I had not to laugh.


Answer:

haha oh my god 

Anonymous asked: i was having sex with my boyfriend last night and my roommate was really drunk and she stumbled into the room while we were doing it and just collapsed on her bed, dead asleep, and my boyfriend and i just paused and looked at her for a minute before shrugging and continuing.


Answer:

Excellent :D

So come on guys, we haven’t been around in a while, but I’m sure between finals, Christmas, and now New Year’s Eve, y’all have had some funny fun times.  

Especially with New Year’s Eve!  You can’t tell me that none of you got busy and that it didn’t turn out funny!  

So what’re your stories?  Submit them!

Anonymous asked: Now that im a mother. My child wasnt really supposed To happen. So me and this guy frim the bar were gettin it in. In his house. Then all of a sudden i feel something wet. He gives Me This look like were dead. He came. And now im a mother..


Answer:

uh.  always use protection, kids.

Anonymous asked: So the boyfran and I were going at it (quite roughly ) in his grandparent's downstairs bathroom so they wouldn't hear. We didn't have enough sense to put the toilet seat down -.- So after loudy knocking everything off the counter and onto the floor, he dropped me into the toilet. Guess who we hd to ask for help from? Nanna and Papa!


Answer:

Oh.  My.  Gosh.  That is so horrible, I’m so sorry.

I’d be lying if I wasn’t hysterically laughing though

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